My Time as Dad in the Limelight

Our 708th Dad in the Limelight is EbonyDad . I want to thank EbonyDad for being a part of this series. It has been great getting connected with him and now sharing EbonyDad with all of you.

1) Tell me about yourself, (as well as how you are in the limelight for my reader’s knowledge)?

Hi, first off I want to thank dadofdivas.com for choosing me to participate in its wonderfulLimelight Dad Series.

I am EbonyDad at ebonydad.com. I am a relatively new dad/parenting blogger! I recently launched my site this past father’s day on June 19th, 2016.  It has been a work in progress as I said ‘I am new to logging’ and have no formal web design and coding experience.  Plus, managing “everyday life” work, family, being a dad has caused sluggishness.

I believe I am in the limelight because of my blog. I started ebonydad.com to give me a place to document my past and continuing experiences of being a dad, good and bad lol.  As my daughter continues to grow the blog will serve as a living time capsule of our journey. How she influenced me to be a better father. I hope my blog becomes a platform for my readers to express their experiences of being a dad, becoming one, or memories of their dad’s.

2) Tell me about your family

I am the proud father of a beautiful, soon to be, 9-year-old little girl. Sadly, my daughter does not live with me, as her mother and I parted ways some time ago.  Although, this has raised some challenges it has not prevented me from being in my daughter’s life. I am only a few towns away and never had any issues seeing my child.  Even with this hurdle, the families on both sides have remained a strong foundation for the nurturing of our daughter.

3) What has been the largest challenge you have had in being a father?

If it is not obvious, it is not being in my daughter’s life full-time.  It’s missing out on too many of the small moments. Like reading a book every night before bed; getting her ready for school; the big hugs, kisses, and smile when I walk in from work. Thinking of those little moments, just being at home with her, are the most difficult to deal with.

4) What advice would you give to other fathers?

The one advice I would give make the best out of the time you have with your children.  We take time for granted all the “time” no pun intended. Seriously, in life, you never know where the road will take you. So if you have children make time and maximize it!

Children grow so fast. I remember nights of my daughter keeping me up as a baby because she would fuss and tear at her face (I felt so bad), due to eczema. To now becoming “a little person” full of ideas and dreams and able to hold full conversations. Making those times of her drooling all over the place and random noises a fading memory.

So enjoy your kids and the time you have with them because it really does go by too fast.

5) How have you come to balance parenthood and outside life?

Balance?  You really can’t “balance” the two, unfortunately. I mean if I am to take the word balance in its literal meaning “an even distribution of weight” life at times does not allow that.  When I am with my daughter, ‘I am with my daughter.’ I try my best to shut out the “outside life” and focus on her needs at that moment. Conversely, when I am in the outside life, I give my attention to that, unless of course there is an emergency. So my suggestion and what has worked for me is creating a schedule and planning. Honestly, separate the two and give full attention to which ever one you are dealing with at the present moment

To try and “balance” both will lead one or both ultimately suffering.

6) What have you learned from the fathers that you have interacted with?

That it is a beautiful thing.  For me I want to be the kind of dad, my dad was to my brother and I.  He loves us unconditionally (my mom too) and I love my daughter unconditionally.

What I have learned from other fathers is that everyone has their own ways and method. No one method is necessarily better than the others.  So I take a little bit from what I see and apply or subtract to how I  want to raise and be remembered as a dad.

Being a parent has taught me many life lessons, shoot it has even taken me to different journeys I would not have experienced or tried otherwise. Like becoming a parent blogger for ebonydad.com

7) What else would you share regarding your experiences as a father thus far?

It is not always going to be easy. Mistakes will be made, tears will flow, but there is always an endless opportunity to do better and be better.  As for me, I am embracing every experience because it helps me to grow and continue to learn.

Don’t get frustrated during times that are hard or difficult just work through them the best you can; And during the “good times” cherish and remember them so you can always look back and smile.

8) What have been the most memorable experiences that you have had thus far as a parent?

Have tons but I will keep it to a short list:

1. The day my daughter was born I thought she looked like an alien because her head was shaped like a conehead lol… Don’t tell her I said that!
2. As a baby, she would cry when I made an angry face because she thought I was mad at her.
3. On her third birthday, I dressed up as D.J. Lance Rock from the show Yo Gabba Gabba.
4. In the middle of the night my daughter creeping into the bed because she was scared.
5. When we went canoeing when she was about six and she actually paddled on her own, while I was in the boat videotaping lol…
6. Dance recitals and soccer games, she is an ok dancer and not that good in soccer… shh, don’t tell her that!
7. Reading to her at night, she loves anything princessy
8. Her first text messages and voicemail a bunch of heart emojis and “where are you daddy, call me back.” too cute
9. Teaching her how to ride a bike.
10. Watching her continue to grow into a beautiful intelligent “little person.”

I really could go on forever on the wonderful memories I have experienced with my daughter and make it an everyday practice to create yours with your own child(ren)!

If you have any questions please leave a comment below.